?

Log in

No account? Create an account
Trevor Stone's Journal
Those who can, do. The rest hyperlink.
So I was just reading an article (from The Watchtower, it seems)… 
6th-Sep-2002 11:32 pm
Trevor baby stare
So I was just reading an article (from The Watchtower, it seems) about why Cats are not fit pets for Christians. (Thanks to memepool for the link.)

And I was thinking... If association with Witches can get Christians to avoid things, what could might we get Christians to stop doing?
I mean, if it was widely publicized that Witches and Satanists showered, would Christians stop showering? If we made a big deal about drinking water, could we get Christians to switch to apple juice? Do paranoid/literalist Christians only use vacuum cleaners because brooms are a "tool of Satan?" There are some entertaining possibilities here. What if we all started wearing crosses?

A pair of entertaining passages from the article are included below the cut tag.

Additionally, cats practice many unclean habits not befitting a Christian household: coughing up fur balls, licking inappropriate body areas on their own bodies (inappropriate handling) and even, in some cases, on the bodies of their human owners (wrongful motive?), urination on the floor, vocal and blatant promiscuity (unknown to any other species, all others being endowed with Godly chastity and decorum) and widespread sexual misconduct without the benefit or sanctity of holy matrimony, even orgiastic practices, substance abuse of catnip (an intoxicating herb) which produces conditions akin to drunkenness, stealing food from the table, producing ungodly sounds, excessive playfulness and the employment of devices not known to have been used by Jesus, the conducting of its unholy business under the cover of the darkness of night, and so on. What sort of example does this give our young ones endeavoring to faithfully serve Jehovah? The Bible clearly shows that 'neither fornicators .. nor thieves .. nor drunkards .. nor revilers .. will inherit the Kingdom.' (1 Cor. 6:9-11)

...

This may not always be the case in terms of felines, where the fact that we are not living in theocratic countries may not prove such an impediment to what God requires of us, as manmade law may not afford such unmerited protection to cats as it does to humans. God's soldiers would be mindful to apply, where the case merited it and local custom did not prohibit it, the principle of Deut. 21:18-21 which states that: 'In case a man happens to have a [dependant] who is stubborn and rebellious, he not listening to the voice of his [guardian], and they have corrected him but he will not listen to them, his [guardian] must also take hold of him and bring him out to the older men of his city and to the gate of his place, and they must say to the older men of his city, 'This [dependant] of ours is stubborn and rebellious; he is not listening to our voice, being a glutton and a drunkard.' Then all the men of his city must pelt him with stones, and he must die.'
This page was loaded Oct 23rd 2018, 7:34 pm GMT.